Subject: Greetings

Inbox

S mintbean	10:40 AM (22 hours ago)

Hey C,

Firstly, I apologise for being so damn MIA as of late. As you are probably aware, I lack basic personal admin skills... which has resulted in the untimely cancellation of my internet services for the next 10-20 working days (if you add weekends, this is approximately a month of no leisurely internet shopping *watch, unwatch, add to cart, remove from cart, omg buy one get 2 free, add quantity* - how will I survive? The answer to this is pending).

I have tried (and failed) to stay afloat and keep up to date with current events, but I missed out on the US Presidential Elections - though, judging by the number of "once you go black, you never go back" Facebook status updates, I'm going to go out on a limb here and assume that Obama doesn't have to spend the weekend packing up all awesome tidbits he's accumulated over the last four years. That or, my friends list is no longer PG13 I must begin to filter it immediately. 

As I sit here sipping on popcorn (seriously, best work snack EVER! 1. nommy 2. hands stay clean 3. keyboard not subject to insect infestation) put popcorn in a cup and take a couple of swings at it from time to time - I recommend Cobs: Lightly Salted, Slightly Sweet - 63 cals per 13g). I can't tell you what 13g is because I don't know, but 63 isn't a terrible bad number so I will log this into MyFitnessPal accordingly "Popcorn - one serve" - when we all know I'm half way through a 145g pack and the likelihood of calling it quits on this magical bag of goodness is ... well, zero.

Additionally, attached is a photo of how I feel today.

S-Poppin' 

TFRE381.tmp.jpg 36K   View   Download

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C Mintbean	10:52 AM (21 hours ago)

Dear S,

How on God's green earth are you SIPPING your popcorn? I've been sitting here for a good five minutes attempting to envision kernels being vacuumed through a straw. I even attempted to Google it, but images of buckets of popcorn with a puny straw stuck in is totally not helping. How does this happen? Do you skewer the popcorn? Or do you just swing bits of popped corn into your mouth like the world's most poorly-designed spoon?

I am officially intrigued, and as such, cannot focus on the other things in your e-mail.

I'm afraid I may need photographic evidence of some sort. Or at the very least, a drawing of how this is possible.


- C (for Confused)

P.S. I NEED A PET SEAL NOW, ON TOP OF A PICTURE OF SOMEONE SIPPIN' POPCORN.

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S mintbean	12:01 PM (20 hours ago)

Dear C,

Please excuse my nudity in the below portrayal of "sipping popcorn".

Kind Regards,

S

photo.JPG 134K   View   Download

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C Mintbean	8:38 AM (13 minutes ago)

Imagine my delight (at 8:35AM, no less) to finally know what sipping popcorn looks like!!

Suddenly, it all makes sense.

C

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C Mintbean	8:41 AM (10 minutes ago)

By the way - thanks for acknowledging the pink elephant in the room. I didn't want to make it awkward by pointing out you seem naked in that picture ... and right next to Barry the Plant, too ...